The Skunkeye Consumer Guide

Sluggish Start

Really don't want to be in the Office today - but don't want to be at home either. It was sooo cold out this weekend - everytime I set out to do something mildy productive - like see a movie, get some coffee, break down and buy that white belt I've been coveting - I'd make it as far as the Korean corner store and turn back. I tried to sort out my boxes and boxes of music but just made an even bigger mess. A steady diet of this and this for every meal this weekend made for a wildly unfitful night trying to sleep. Sucks when I prefer to be at work by 7 am. Maybe its this week's full moon. I had this ongoing, epic, half-awake dream that I was trying desperately to stop my sister's wedding before the ceremony beacuse I had discovered she was making a deal with Satan - the fiance and his family were different people, though. Very Rosemary's Baby.

Just found out Lea finally got married this weekend - I'm very happy for her. Her mother, a classic stage mother, must be very pleased.

Had a disturbing encounter with my house mate - he was outside in the cold with the rats running around, smoking cigarettes barefoot, clearly all tweaked up, going on and on about how he broke a tooth, and how he urgently needs to visit this secret shrine in China Town for better luck, and he showed me a new shearling jacket that a "friend" just bought for him. Nothing new, I suppose, but it gets a little tedious...

Today I need to figure out how to properly add fave sites to my blog - do I do it with typelists? What are typelists, I still can't quite figure it out? I dunno... I'm kind of not into working on my site today- a bit bored with the world, cranky, and feeling private. Check out this, this, and this for more inspired and lively reading. Denby sent me some new work to include in her special corner.

The Barbarian Invasions, Part Deux

Christ, this agency has a butthole for a brain! In the time I have been in this building, they have been systematically dismantling and destroying it, creating total fugliness in the name of improvement. I knew they were bad when they would intrude unannounced in my former house and rip apart and reconfigure with shoddy drywall a Frank Lloyd Wright's protegee's landmark design and mount huge dinghies and put railing around the beautiful Hontiveros-designed pool for "safety" reasons. God knows what they have done to the other house since we have left. My mom is always good at maintaining the upper hand when it comes to these things and these dimwits. Yesterday I noticed they are replacing the gold art-deco elevator doors with dirty, nasty white afterthoughts. The marbled floor in the foyer is being patched up with mismatching and randomly-chosen squares of linoleum. The classic restrooms (urinals you could swim in) are endlessly being torn apart and "renovated." I'm amazed they haven't wallpapered over the Ben Shahn WPA murals yet! Or sandblasted the Isamu Noguchi reliefs!

Why can't government employees dress? Lord, I don't wanna become a sheepman. There is always an ambulance waiting out front - this building is a hive of unhealthiness, pastiness, and obesity. We have such a melange here: Cantonese, Mandarin, Burmese, Koreans, and Mongolians rushing to the studios, vodka-soaked Russians, French speaking nubians, possees of Persians, bottle-blond Eastern Europeans in furs, chain-smoking Croatians, maypole dancers, queens of mombasa, whirling dervishes ... But the Ugly American reigns, dominates.

Last night I decided to be young and beautiful. Met up with MJ, D, and F here and had a lovely time by the fire. Toasted the new year, gonna use my mojo for them 'cause it sure ain't working for me (I have been instrumental in several unions), came to the conclusion that Eurotrash is a good thing (in light of the les Ugly Amercaines). And Zara in Georgetown really kinda sucks - why aren't they stocking the good stuff?

Definately need this today. And loads of this.

How Do You Say That?

I'm going through a fallow period at work right now - actually in my life in general. Things were really busy and stressful before the holidays and now they have slacked off. Since I have no real job description, other than being The Man's bitch, I'm always having to use my creativity to find things to do. Since The Man is out of town in China for a couple of weeks, I'm going to have to task myself with fulfilling duties (maybe finally tackle my Bert Berns project/American Originals series or find a new job. Hard to motivate myself.

One thing I've fallen into at work is being the token gringo on the Indonesian Service's "How Do you Say That?" series. Apparently the audience responds well to me. Surprising since I'm usually half-awake during the tapings. We took these photos back in December. I'm looking very pasty - time to get back to the gym (that's something I can do at work!!!)- good that the photos are blurry. I'm being muy American, buying my little brown brothers hot dogs.

Oh, I spoke too soon... things just got really busy...

Ask Skunkeye

I’ve always maintained that I’m brilliant at PR when it comes to everything and every one but myself so I wonder why my Skunkeye hits are surging in the new year. I haven’t done much by way of publicity and my most of my friends have lost in interest or forgotten that I have this site (I should start dishing more…). The Skunkeye Consumer Guide clearly does not fit into one category and I have no special interest angle or poltical agenda or any informed, strong opinions to express or really any sort of brilliant life to write about. In fact, I'm hitting a post-holiday low of boredome and apathy and have no choice but to respond your search questions. Fortunately, although I still get countless searches for “1/2 Price Anal Salty Weiner Bugers” and variations on Paris Hilton, the queries have become more diversified and interesting:

1. crack cafe manila version
Is this some dance mix? Well, I can’t think of any “crack cafes” in Manila. I don’t think crack is really that popular in the Philippines. Cocaine is pretty hard to get, and I could always tell it was in town because folks started getting more secretive, spending a lot of time in night club powder rooms, and suddenly getting cozy with former friends. The most widely-used drug is called “shabu” or “shabs” – a methamphetamine hydrochloride. You smoke it in foil. I stayed way clear of the shabu users – you could never trust them – and really, shabs is so pedestrian. The club kids were into the ecstasy and Special K of course while I was there which just made them more friendly or sink into a K hole

Here is a strange Japanese site called Crack’s Café.

2. theme walk away renee
Lovely tune. Found this site from a well-traveled dog-lover into literature.

3. sofia coppola mark jacobs
You can toss those tired Murakami fakes now – new trend alert. Soon to appear on the corner of Wiscosin and N in Georgetown.

4. Paul Bowles a sick fuck
Wasn’t he though… always appealed to me more as a character – found his writing a little hard to get through.

5. studies about plankton conducted in Philippines
Coral reefs use their tentacles to capture passing plankton, which is their source of nutrition. Unfortunately much of the reef life in the Philippines has been destroyed by fisherman who use cyanide and dynamite to catch fish in a more easy and fast way. But I’m sure whoever was searching for studies probably already knew that..

6. what happens to taylor in the bold and the beautiful?
Dr. Taylor was shot by crazy Sheila during a struggle, I think she was really aiming for Brooke. Taylor had a melodramatic exit saying goodbye to her family and friends from her hospital bed. She gave her blessing to Brooke to be with Ridge but that’s all screwed up now of course. It's all really tedious and repetitive that show - and I love the way they are "aging" the kids a good 5 years so they they can having sex and shit. The boy playing Ridge's son has serious gayboy traits so they will probably butch him up with the new actor. I only started to watch the show to bond with the ladies in the office - it helped that i personally knew two of the actresses on the other story they watch - but I’m proud to say I have not watched in 2004. Here is a good resource for those out of the loop - I find that I don't even need to watch the show - I just read the recaps and spoilers.

7. actors of the swinging london and sixties
We lost David Hemmings and Alan Bates recently. This is kind of a cool page I just found.

8. "Keren Ann"+interview
She has a new album, ‘Not Going Anywhere, “in English, out in the US now. I think it might be the same material from her French albums, only in English (which kind of defeats her appeal for me). Anyways, you can order it at Other Music, one of my favourite record stores. I'm not in any hurry.

9. von dutch " the trend"
Way, way OVER. Same with Ugg Boots. Should have absolutely, never have started.

10. kris aquino joey genitals
Please, she’s working on her next scandal already. Poor Cory.

"You Really Got Me!"

The singer-songwriter Ray Davies of the Kinks has been shot and wounded in the leg by a mugger in New Orleans after a chase. Apparently he has recovered and has been released from the hospital.

The Barbarian Invasions

I need to say now that seeing The Barbarian Invasions by oneself alone on a Saturday afternoon is a sad, pitiful, miserable, and tragic thing. Word of advice: never, EVER, let yourself get into that state. It's not healthy. Marie-Josee Croze as the junkie(Ararat, Maelstrom) was sublime. I'm all obsessed by Canada and Canadians right now - Hawksley Workman - and it blows me away that they are on the same continent yet so removed, intellectal, refined, and, well, European - why is America so fucked up? I cried through the last quarter not because it was a sad melodrama but that its just wrong I should spend an afternoon like that alone in that dark theater.

The weather has been deliciously mild this weekend and I bought more paper white bulbs and an amarilys at Johnson's. Also acquired a killer Byblos jacket- eggpant coloured tweed with zippers and a deconstructed, post-modern edge. Who knows - bolero jackets for men in 2004? Not with this gut.

My folks left yesterday for Hawaii then back to Korea. It was great seeing them and I need to figure out how the hell I can manage and afford a trip to see them and my dog. Also met and spent time wih clumsy housemate's folks and I figure mself, family, and friends are defiantely set up if we need care at Sloane-Kettering!

(Last Night We Were Like) Delicious Wolves

Well, we survived the Jerry Springer visit yesterday – my relations are actually in better shape than I expected. We waited for them at a dismal Cracker Barrel in Hagerstown, MD and honestly almost everyone who walked through the door could have been mi familia from the other side of the tracks – lots of sallow complexions, run-down expressions and unkept ensembles. I was so hungry I ordered biscuits and gravy – it had the consistency of snot and looked like a bowl of tepid jizz – nasty. They finally showed up and we had a nice visit. My uncle came too and hadn’t seen him in over ten years. Fortunately my cousin is over his Marilyn Manson stage, was not on chemicals as far as I could tell, and did not have rubber snakes coming out of ears – he has actually turned out to be quite articulate, artistic, creative, and thoughtful and was really excited about moving into his new trailer – which is apparently very retro with the original linoleum. I sent him this book today as a housewarming. Of course there is much drama going on with them but I think my aunt sort of gets off on tragedy. They’ve really had difficult lives and I hope things will get better. It was really nice catching up with them.

On the way back we stopped at the Outlets and I finally bought new towels. The towels I have been using are at least 40 years old and are what we used to bathe our dogs. My new ones are nice, pale green with Indian elephants embroidered on the bottom – totally goes with my space. Also I bought a white Indian cotton embroidered shirt.

Based on a review that I read in Uncut at the beach, and hungry for some fresh music, I stopped by Tower and bought two Hawksley Workman discs. Let me just say this shit is amazing. Damn those Canadians – they got it going on! This kid is all swagger, sway, strut, purr, coo, growl and grind - punctuated by ecstaic yelps, sensual sighs with his Freddy Mercury muti-octave chops. Guys definately got a confident libido (and I'm all for putting the smut back in music) and a cocky talent - but it all pours down so smooth that any perceptions of preciousness (and that is one thing I LOATHE) or pretentiousness evaporate when this pop tart lierally blows the roof off from over yr head. Amazing talent. Take the electric stomp and glide of 70’s glam (Bowie, T-Rex), throw in a bit of a Sparklehorse with a higher sprem count, mix Prince's Dirty Mind with Leonard Cohen's libidinous poetic wordplay and the substantial grasp of European and North American folk tradition and art song of a die-hard with a hard-on troubadour (like Scott Walker or Jacques Brel), add the expansive and urgent self-absorption of Jeff and Tim Buckley, the clever and lush orchestration of Andrew Bird- and its all propelled with pulsating rhythm - oh forget it, this guy is beyond category. He’s huge in France. And the lyrics… “Jealous of your Cigarette”… brilliant. One could compare him to Rufus Wainwright, but honestly Hawksley Workman could kick his fey, tired, skinny, whiney, recovering ass on the playground any day. In fact, I belive Hawksley Workman has singlehandedly cockblocked my allegiances. I’ve had the first track, “Striptease,” from his second album, (Last Night We were Like) Delicious Wolves in my head all day and can’t wait to go home and listen to it again. I haven’t even really listened to the other album I bought, For Him and the Girls, yet – I’m still savouring Delicious Wolves. Workman has a new one out, Lover/Fighter, and if it doesn’t get US release in say, a week, I’ll be forced to buy the import. Great start to the new year, really gets my blood pumping!

Some Say It With A Brick

Sitting here on this New Year typing on some word pad type application on Daniel's expensive G4 which I had to guide him through to install and, to be real, paid for with my monster rent. Now how is he supposed to produce a CV and get a job on this shit? And I don't know how many times I've typed and saved and mailed out cover letters and CVs for him. What does he imagine - a G4 is for online sex, chat rooms, and loading up yr I-Pod? No Word applications, nothing practical. Hell, if I had a G4, I'd be designing magazines, winning awards with ad campaigns, and producing independent films. Its been six months since he has had a job and dude has been to Argentina, San Francisco, Florida (annual Disney trip!), and NYC on often trip. He's probably all tweaked out on poppers and meth right now. Sugar Daddy sure gave him a passport to the American Dream.

I'm homebody this New Year's Eve with the excuse that I have to leave early to visit the Jerry Springer side of my family (they really do live in trailers!) in Pennsylvania at a neutral Cracker Barrel ('lil cousins will undoubtedly be on some kind of chemical as will my uncle who has been tooling around the fast-food industry for the last 20 years hoping for some kind of a breakthrough- my dad casts a long, long shadow, believe me). I'm actually staying home tonight because my pares are out of town and I don't really have too many options (not that I'm that motivated). I remember - not so long ago - when my New Year festivities were glam and spectacular and star-studded and full of fireworks. Gun shots in the night and falling into fountains. Tumbling out of a club, stumbling, and seeing the sun rise over the skyline of a vaguely familiar street . Guess I'm all quiet nights and cardigans now. Yeah...

Bumblefuck housemate Ezra (in the alley by the trash bin is a heap of the furniture he has broken) had some of his band camp friends over tonight and they got drunk rapidly over a couple of wine spritzers. They were sweet but I will maintain I will not share house with a 23-year-old again. I took care of the dishes because they were ultimately and inextricably going to break them. Ezra's homely girlfriend is saucey and cruel-witted under the influence though. I dig that.

Also Toxic M invited me over for champagne, cheese and crackers but I begged off. Very sweet and kind of her though.

So now this evening I take inventory. Today was especially sweet and emotional with the retirement party for the Khmer Service's Sarouem Tes (after 47 years years of service at VOA) and retiring Vietnamese/Thai Service Chief Mr. Mccarthy's 84th birthday celebration. Glad we came back from the beach a day earlier than I expected. The Beach was great, by the way, even though I lost it one night because everyone except me is having an exciting life, traveling, in love, and prosperous. And no one spoke to me over he course of the meal, they were so self-involved. Lost it doing the dishes, Collected a great many shells and read Eugendises' Midlesex in one day. Also got to see Cold Mountain and actually in North Carolina, this is the book a friend edited and made her a literary wunderkind, and we drove past Petersburg where the trenches were... Mi familia did not dig the film but I figure they did not get the heavy-handed references. Myself found the film a bit schematic and arbitrary at the start, and was distracted by the celebrity cameos, but nonetheless enjoyed it thoroughly. See, I'm easy to please!

Cinematically, City of God, Movarn Callar, 21 Grams, Lost in Translation, Demonlover, Thirteen, Laurel Canyon, Dopamine, In America, and the great ride of Kill Bill gave me hope and entertainment this year. I guess I'll have to terminate my Netflix account because I can never stay awake watching DVDs.

Music-wise -- new music, that is -- upstarts The Libertines, British Sea Power, the Kills, Raveonettes, the Yeah-Yeah-Yeahs.. all made me feel so young when I'm really so old just by re-hashing the shit of my youth in wonderful and contrived ways. The Goldfrapp performance was amazing, as was Junior Senior with the Electric Six. So was Cousteau. Apologies to the girl I made out with at the Nick Cave show. Otherwise I'm just listening to Aurther Lee & Love (dammit missed the show at the Birchmere), Bert Berns produit, various obscure 60s-70s Euro garage rock, and French, Spanish, and Italian chanteuse shit. Got my brief Electroclash infatuation out of my system and am now getting back to my roots with my dusty Clash cassettes. Smoking menthol.

I am so grateful that my grandmother has made it through. I guess this year has been scary and we have all, especially Smither, have had to find strength in places we didn't even know existed. Those awful hours in the hospital, the ICU, and in the rehab center when I felt the whole cosmos was going to fall apart. That she is back on her feet, on her own in her own home, sharper than ever, living and relishing her life as she should...

Well, that should make for a brilliant and fulfilling 2004. Cheers.