The Skunkeye Consumer Guide

Cool Show

I generally dislike snow but this exhibition looks really amazing.

Skunkeye The Orchid Slayer

I learn something new each day

Today I finally figured out how to do the "strikethru" font. Skunkeye missed out on the whole tech thing while he was off getting drunk in Manila and is desperately trying to catch up so his little vanity project will look cool.

Now, if someone could show me how to take care of orchids. Those things are expensive! The flowers keep falling off and none grow back so all I have are these naked stalks. Maybe there is an invisible monkey living in my house who likes to eat flowers. Also, I think my habitat is being attacked by some sort of mysterious plant-flu. Except for my narcissi which I'm really getting sick of. I realize my green thumb is haphazard at best but this epidemic is truly discouraging.

Its another beautiful day outside. Sucks in here. Now tell me, why do they keep posting new jobs in Services that are being cut at the end of the month?

Skunkeye Funkeye

WARNING:
Will be muy dramtico today. Apologies. scuse. Should be backed by a ragamuffin band of blind street musicians with broken instruments on a dirty, dusty, busy third-world city traffic junction. And the lead singer is a triple-amputee dwarf.

Not worth composing an entry today but it should be said that morale has never been so low in our agency since Skunkeye arrived fresh-faced, eager, and full of dreams nearly three years ago. Management is commiting some serious blunders and not taking care of its people very well at all. Puling fast ones left and right and showing shameless excess. We're a vibrant, energetic, multi-cultural friendly lot but the dejected air in the halls is palpable.

Normally stylish Skunkeye has taken to wearing Dad clothes - you know, the kind worn doing yard work on Saturdays before taking the kids to their soccer match. And sporting the same boring jacket for weeks - unheard of! Skunkeye just don't care no more.

Seriously, dunno how this all going to end up but fealing very helpless, hopeless, and small indeed! And we still have yet to be paid!!!

On a brighter note, it was almost Spring-like in DC today.

Skunkeye With A Pearl Earring

Finally went to see Girl With A Pearl Earring on Friday. Almost didn’t make the show and kept MJ when I was trying to take a short-cut and got stuck on 26th and K in the punding rain trying to cross the street – that is the slowest light ever – not pedestrian friendly. I was completely getting drawn into the film – I had anticipated it being a snooze. Actually a drunken homeless guy who wandered into the theater evidently thought so and proceeded to snore loudly from the back row, disturbing every one. It goes without saying that I was the only, um, guy in the audience so it fell upon me to take care of the situation. Fortunately, I was able to grab a security guard from right outside the theater and he escorted our friend out. By that time, the mood had been killed and key dialogue had been missed. Guess I’ll have to read the book now. Damn.

Skunkeye was fortunate to view the Vermeer exhibit several times a couple of years back. It was somewhat of a frustrating experience since the crowds were out of control and the paintings really are quite small. The film effectively brought the audience into the mind and vision of the artist and the artistic process without being too heavy-handed.

Schlepped uptown for a change of scene and shopping and returned empty-handed for a lack of inspiration and alarming lack of funds. Since the weather was nice and I didn’t have anything better to do that day, decided to walk home from Friendship Heights. Stopped by the Zoo, which I haven’t done in years, and was completely transfixed by a two-year-old elephant playing with a ball. Also the orangutans were just darling, hugging and kissing each other. Being completely agoraphobic, the Zoo and its crowds are too much for me. Off-season is the best time to go although most of the animals are not on display.

Skunkeye also bought an obscene amount of music, including the new Walkmen, which I don’t particularly care for upon first listen. Those guys are the kid brothers of classmates - I remember them as little geeky brats. I thought they were brilliant as Jonathan Fire*Eater, and they always put on a spirited, rousing show, and I liked the first album very much. But this one doesn’t seem to do it for me. Sorry. They scored a big write-up in last week’s Entertainment Weekly.

My still out-of-work Chinese housemate has decided to fuck looking for a job and become an interior designer/contractor instead. That’s like Skunkeye quitting his job and suddenly becoming the first man on Mars. Giving him some career counseling, I tried to stress that these things just don’t happen right away – you need education, contacts, clients, experience, and certification. He’s handy with a paintbrush for sure, and likes to fix things up around the house, but it takes more than that. I told him he should specialize, find an area of expertise – in other words, ya gotta find a gimmick. I steered him towards the Interior design program at the Corcoran and the American Society of Interior designers resources page on the net, but this is the guy who can't even get around to putting together his CV on the computer. It’s nice to see him all excited by something other than chemicals, and I wish him all the luck. Restaurant/hotel work seems to interfere with his social life and sleeping patterns I suppose. Don’t know his Sugar Daddy’s take on all this but I imagine he’ll be supporting him financially even more in the coming months.

My experience in the DC interior design world was horrific. I worked for an asshole designer who managed to find some success, and was expanding, but he drove it all into the ground in the course of one summer, fueled by an out of control temper and a nasty alcohol and cocaine habit. Lost his staff, showroom, atelier, and clients in a rapid descent. Nelly fuck. To this day, any time I hear the term "faux finishing"... just want to spew.

On a sad note learned a classmate of mine from Kuala Lumpur days died in his sleep on Friday in Jordan. Apparently through an accidental and lethal mixture of alcohol and Valium. This is the second time something like this has happened to one of my friends in the last two years. Kids, be careful!!!

Brit Lit

The arts coverage in the Guardian never fails to impress me in its range and quality of writing. Today, John Harris offers an insightful and heartfelt account of how he came to be obssessed with Gram Parsons. Also check out the meticulous tribute he put together. Skunkeye must have been muy preoccupied as of late to have let this film escape my radar. Did it already come out? Elsewhere in the Guardian, Norah gets trashed, Courtney gets compassion, and I might just have been sold on Baby Spice's solo album. Find out why Katia Lund, co-director of City of God, is not getting Oscar props, why Yoko Ono should be revered, and, as America is still in a tizzy over JJ's flapjack, how swearing no longer has the power to shock UK television audiences. Sigmer Polke too.

Also, a must-read is Eurotrash. Hysterical. She is really on a roll - it gets more biting and hilarious each day.

Le Tourbillon

Skunkeye has been so frazzled as of late that he has not been aware that Jeanne Moreau is in town and that they are giving the legend a retrospective of sorts a the AFI. The Bride Wore Black and Jules & Jim are two of my all-time favorites. She looks to be in fine shape; I’d heard a while back that her house burned down or something tragic like that.

I was just thinking of her - that's wild, huh - the other day when I learned sexy rockers Cousteau suddenly changed their name to Moreau, apparently for legal reasons. New studio album, Novia Scotia in the works. Maybe they are referencing The Island of Dr. Moreau. Could work either way.. Dunno, but Jeanne Moreau is a classy, artistic lady - hope she has the grace and wits to take it as a compliment and not to sue.

Bits & Pieces of Skunkeye

Just got a shout-out from Art is For Losers and it is a great honor indeed. If you haven’t visited his space, you’re missing one of the wittiest, sharpest, candid and brave voices coming from the nether regions inside the beltway. Lose yourself in his banter. Art is For Losers is the Pirate of the Blogosphere, the Cowboy of Cyberspace, the Master & Commander of lyrical pith, wears great shoes, way too clever, and is a little bit dangerous. But don’t let his oft-barbed playfulness fool ya – Art is For Losers is truly a sincere, tolerant, and sensitive soul. Handsome, too.

I’ve neglected to say what my theme song is as of late. Well, Up On the Roof as performed and recorded by Little Eva has been streaming continuously in Skunkeye land. Can’t really get up to my roof in my present living situation, don’t even have a balcony, and besides its been damn cold. But right now the idea of getting away from the hustling crowd, cares just drifting right into space, and the stars putting on a show for free – well, it just seems awfully nice.

For lack of anything better to right about, was going to catch up on my Ask Skunkeye queries. Alas, they aren’t very interesting right now. However, Skunkeye has been given some insight into the mysterious “manila crack café” that keeps appearing in my stats. In my comments, from a Mr. Masudman, is:

“Can u give me the cafe manilas serial number?
cafe manila is a cyber cafe managment system.
the version is 8.2.0”

I’m sorry, Skunkeye is a total luddite when it comes to matters of technology and besides, Mr. Masudman, what you appear to be attempting seems kinda creepy and possibly illegal. Terrorism, maybe? I dunno…

Also, still getting those “vaginal smoke” queries. Lots of “kris aquino.” "Von Dutch and Kressley.” Now, now... you know Skunkeye doesn't go near that tired shit.

My favorite, however, is “Damage Control Consumer Guide.”

You don’t even want to know how much damage control I’ve had to do lately…

Nice Package

Sometimes packages have a way of arriving with perfect timing. Just when I needed a break from the tedious telenova that has been my office life, and to some extent my home life, a bubblewrapped box of goodies was waiting on my desk yesterday.

I’ve been searching for Lhasa de Sela’s La Llorona for some time now – it was released when I was out of the country so I missed the buzz, if thee was any, in the United States. Her beautiful and haunting “De Cara a la Pared” was used to great effect in John Sayles’ film Casa De Los Babys and I have it on a couple of compilations. Lhasa de Sela also dueted with the Tindersticks on 'Sometimes it hurts' from the recent Waiting For the Moon album. Her new realease, The Living Road, is only available in Europe and Canada, so in anticipation of US release, I ordered 1998’s La Llorona. Truly a splendid debut! Think a half Mexican American, half Jewish American PJ Harvey, raised in Mexico, Montreal and now living in France, navigating the links between Mexican ranchera, Eastern European klezmer, Portuguese fado, Spanish Flamenco, and European art song, strong, aching voice full of passion, saudade and tristealegria. Most of the compositions are original yet they seem timeless and the production by guitarist- arranger Yves Desrosiers is stunning. Lhasa de Sela’s delivery is forthright, orginal, and heartfelt without veering into preciousness. And she’s really young too! What a journey!

Also received Le Bataclan ’72, a re-mastered CD of a one off reunion concert in Paris by Lou Reed, Nico, and John Cale. I would have to, in all honesty, this one is for Velvet Underground completists. It’s a pretty somber affair, aside from John Cale’s lighter numbers (“The Biggest, Loudest, Hairiest Group Of All” and “Empty Bottles”) and a little deadpan levity from Lou Reed (in introducing “Berlin,” said it was his “Barbra Streisand song” and Nico’s “I dooo nooot smoooke cigaaarettes”). I guess that’s what you can expect from a couple of junkies in career transition. Surely, a historical concert, however, and the liner notes are good, if not a bit florid.

I guess the main pleasure for me with Bataclan ’72 is the sense of nostalgia it brings. In college, one Spring evening I decided to devote one of my radio shows to the Velvet Underground. I was also trying to impress a girl, or two girls actually. A charming, aging rock ‘n roll, stoner-type I worked with (and there were many) kindly lent me all these VU bootlegs on vinyl, and this recording was one of them. So Skunkeye and the girls were partying in the studios I was trying my best to be cool. I have the show still on tape somewhere (and used the versions of “Waiting for My Man” and “Femme Fatale from this disc). It was probably the only time I was drunk or buzzed on air and you can sure hear it. And I didn't get anywhere. Embarrassing.

Also delivered was the handsomely packaged, hard-bound Palomar: The Heartbreak Soup Stories by Gilbert Hernandez. I’ve got most of the run, at least through 1990 or so, when I abadoned comic books for more heady pursuits, in storage some place but its nice to have it all put together like this. It’s been a while since I’ve entered that world and will be nice getting re-acquainted when I can find a quiet moment. ah, innocent youth...

Titanic

The inevitable happened and the Director just formally announced the slashing of our Bulgarian, Estonian, Czech, Hungarian, Latvian, Lithuanian, Polish, Romanian, Slovak, and Slovenian Services,
along with many of our broadcast feeds to affiliate stations in Central and Southeastern Europe. I feel just terribly for all the people losing their jobs and with all the cutbacks there is a hiring freeze which affects my future plans. Feels like the Titanic around here.

Aside from scouting reception locations with my sister and her fiancée, which was special, my weekend was a bust. Ended up slumped on the living room couch and sinking into a K(ble)-hole watching back to back episodes of Bands Reunited. My, some rock stars just do not age well at all...

Also saw a well-crafted documentary on HBO - just about broke my heart...